(This post is part of a series. If you'd like to know what it's all about, go here.)
Now. I almost threw this card away today. I love to sew fabric to cards. It's like sending a tiny little quilt in the mail. This one would have been pretty cute if I had listened to my own warnings and glued that blue strip down first. It's crooked and puckery and that really bugs me, so my plan was to toss it and make another one. But I just couldn't do it. I couldn't throw her in with the empty boxes and crumpled paper, despite her flaws. I spent time and energy on her and thought about the person to whom I would send it. I just couldn't throw her away. So, I will fill her with words to thank and encourage, and send her off, and she will fulfill her purpose, despite her imperfections.
Lord, if You were in the business of discarding flawed people, I would have been in the trash a long time ago. But You look beyond my imperfections and give me purpose. You fill me with good things. It is Your pleasure to use the weak and damaged for Your glory. I feel weak today; thank You for using me anyway. I love You so much. ~R
So, where did you see Him today?
And now, dear children, continue in him, so that when he appears we may be confident and unashamed before him at his coming. (I John 2:28)
okay I took this little assignment seriously and, well, I am looking for Jesus and I am feeling annoyed. I guess I have had a hard time looking beyond myself. What I see is my shortcomings to be patient, loving, kind and gentle like Jesus. I am seeing I fall so short of the perfect I crave. Where is Jesus in this? Where is he when I am feeling impatient with my kids and whining at the them for whining and being impatient? So not only is what I am finding in myself annoying me, I am then annoyed that I am annoyed! ... that is certainly not Jesus. Well, then my son brings me a picture he has been working on that says in large red letters, "I love you Mommy". I think, "Man. Why?" Why when I am grouchy and hormonal and falling short of Jesus can anyone love me? But then I think, Jesus does! He walked up to me in the body of an 7 year old boy, and told me he accepts me. He offers to cover and cleanse my "not good enough" in his "good enough." He says if I can receive that offer, I am okay. I resist receiving the love---it doesn't feel right. I don't deserve it. I haven't earned it. Yet he whispers in my ear "I have covered and cleansed you. I love you. You are adequate." I have seen Jesus today. I have seen him in the gutters of my faults and guilt. Now I must take a deep breath, let go of my own effort and very simply with joy, receive the gift of his delight.
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